Ya know, it's been quite some time since I posted a retrospective, and not without good reason:
Everytime I've done so, I've been reminded by numerous readers that Bushflash ain't about me, and I shouldn't waste column inches talking about myself. While there is a great deal of merit to this argument, I feel that concerned parties and individuals deserve to know why I've been away, for the past month-plus.
To fully describe where Bushflash finds itself today, one must understand how this all started.
I started Bushflash in 2003, a few weeks before the invasion of Iraq, because the words of those who were speaking out against the coming war were not being heard. No one on any television network was daring to utter a single word of caution against the desperately suicidal path that we were embarking upon. Those who had a nasty habit of questioning authority, like Phil Donahue, were jerked off the air, and replaced with foul-mouthed brownshirts like Michael Savage.
Whenever someone like Scott Ritter, Amy Goodman, or Jim Hightower was granted a measly 20 seconds of airtime, they were never given their fair time to speak, and were roundly condemned by the show's host for having the gall to question the policies of a man so brilliant and visionary as George W. Bush. Neil Boortz, Rush Limbaugh, and Glenn Beck were shoved into our collective living rooms as the final arbiters of truth in the new Bush Order.
The only place where any dissent or word of caution could still find purchase was the Internet, and even there, things were dicey. In the wake of 9/11 hysteria, many websites critical of the idiot-in-chief had voluntarily shut down.
The country was being led down the garden path to a war that was certain to be more disastrous than Vietnam, and it seemed that the american people were perfectly willing to surrender their power of critical thought, in favor of a chest-thumping groupthink peddled by charlatans. Even the now-venerated Jon Stewart refused to utter a critical word, in the leadup to the war.
It was an utterly distressing time, for those of us who still were able to think clearly. Recalling those days- it was, at that time, credible to believe that book burnings and torchlight parades were right around the corner.
Now, I was raised in a household where I was taught the lessons of history- particularly those which were learned at great expense during the years of World War 2. While much can be said about that horrific conflict, the question that arises time and again is:
"When The Nazis were ascending to power, how come so few spoke out? How come so many could not find it within themselves to stand up for what was right, when it mattered the most?"
(Oh, and for the purposes of this discussion- Godwin's law is bollox.)
Now, we here in the USA were being called upon to utter those few, crucial words of dissent- and I was determined that no matter what came, I'd do whatever I could, in my limited capacity, to make it known that when things were darkest, there was at least one human being left in the United States of America that refused to be a "loyal German."
When Bushflash came into existence- there was no YouTube, archive.org, or- for that matter- 99% of the Blogs that exist today. If you were looking for online political media, you had a few realplayer streams, a few talk radio archive sites, and a few sites like Information Clearing House. "User-generated content" had yet to be coined as an advertising buzzword.
It was into this primordial soup that Bushflash took form, and grew to become one of the most popular political sites, for but a brief time. It all started with a simple flash animation that, despite its primitive nature, garnered tens of thousands of views in the first week it was online.
I was soon to learn that in times that are consumed with lies, daring to tell the truth is certain to be deemed as treasonous. Death threats soon came- threatening phone calls- nasty letters- e-mails containing nothing but my home address, along with the word "click."
Rather than do anything to dissuade me in my activities, every one of these dribbles of cowardice that I encountered only confirmed in me the knowledge that I was doing the right thing- and I WAS HAVING AN EFFECT. I was letting the brownshirts of america know that there were still people out here who hadn't sacrificed their reason on the altar of a grotesquely shallow and transparent political expediency- and goddammit- they resented the hell out of me, for doing that .
But rattling the cage of the radical right was just icing on the cake- ya see, the real joy of making and maintaining Bushflash was getting all of those thousands upon thousands of e-mails from people saying:
"Thank you for letting me know I'm no the only one out here who feels this way."
The true honor of running this site is that, during the darkest times of the past few years, I was able to give other people hope- because such was a commodity in short supply, for far too long.
Now, five years later, that spark of dissent and independent thought has once again strengthened, and has been fanned into a flame that now illuminates 89% of the american people.
I turn on CNN, and I see Jack Cafferty shouting that Bush is a "Moron," and his cabinet is a "Gaggle of mutants." Every night, I can tune into Keith Olbermann, and get a full hour of righteous truth, free of any semblance of whitehouse spin. The blogosphere has finally awoken from its dormant slumber, and surprise, surprise, we find the paleoconservatives finally re-emerging, and calling bullshit on the entirety of the Bush administration, loudly and fiercely.
When I look upon this spectacle, I can only think:
"My job is done, here."
Ya see, I never wanted to be a blogger- I never wanted to be a media portal. I never wanted to do anything, but whatever I could to make sure that dissent stayed alive, during those dark years.
I can't claim that I did it single handedly- but I did what I could- and it's cost me.
For two whole years, I pretty much ran Bushflash as a full-time job- and even turned down a few REAL jobs, because they restricted my ability to run this not-for-profit site. I didn't even offer or accept advertising for the first three years, because I didn't want to have anyone get the idea I was running this site, for any other reason, outside of ideological ones.
Needless to say- during those three years, times were pretty lean... To make matters worse: even though I was making just enough to get by on, the IRS decided that I was just too fat and wealthy, so they bumped me to the 25% tax bracket.
In addition , running Bushflash was psychologically damaging. You try running a website that demands that you are pissed off and angry every waking moment for five years, and see how you end up feeling. There are so many pictures of dead kids that one can look at, before one starts to lose their grip.
Needless to say- this could not continue. I like being a dissident, but I don't wanna be one that winds up dying in a cheap hotel room amidst a million cigarette butts, and thousands of hand-written pages in a coded script that will be puzzled over by cryptologists for generations to come.
In 2006, I started working less on Bushflash, so that I could work with a friend to start a highly speculative business. Long story short- they don't call 'em "speculative" for nothin'. I had another year of lean times, and another whopping tax bill (ya see- the IRS thinks that anyone who makes 18,000 a year is just too danged rich for his own good, and should pay extra penance to make up for those Bush Tax Cuts for the wealthy.)
Now, in 2008, we see Bush heading towards the exit, and quite frankly, it's a completely different internet, than it was, when I crafted the first version of Bushflash. Now, there are literally thousands of hours of online political videos/documentaries, available in seconds, that are far better than any flash I ever created. Blogs like DailyKos allow anyone to piggyback their opinions on a site that gets millions of daily hits. Obama is shattering any and all preconceptions of what a political campaign can accomplish, via the web.
15 years after Jello Biafra exhorted his post-punk fans to "Become the Media!", his words have become the unknown gospel to a generation that is emerging- a generation that has used the internet since they were in kindergarten- and they don't see media as something to be observed- they see it as something to CREATE.
But I digress....
In recent months, I have woken up from a long slumber, and realized that I had to make changes. It was finally time to quit smoking- time to stop spending so much time at the keyboard- time to get out to the local Y, and get in shape, at long freaking last (still single at 38, and certainly ain't getting any younger.)
I have also been working demanding jobs (sometimes three at a time,) paying off my back taxes, and actually leaving the keyboard for a few hours, to remember why life is worth living...
I cannot continue to run this site in a manner that can keep up with what is expected of blogs, by myself. I have tried hard to find someone who could create a content management system that would allow me to turn Bushflash into the community that I always envisioned, but despite a lot of time and money spent, such searches were always ultimately fruitless.
In times past, I have asked for contributions, but always felt guilty for doing so. This time, I shall pay off my debts with money that I've EARNED.
I must lay aside Bushflash, so that I can repair all the damage that has been done, in my own life, during the Bush years.
Does this mean I'm shutting up, giving in, or surrendering?
HELL NO.
Bushflash will stay online- every last sentence, youtube link, video, picture, and scatological reference will be freely available, until the day that Bush leaves office. I stand by everything I've done or written for this site, and am proud to have done so, when too many others sat silent.
I will be posting comments on the night of Obama's nomination, and the day prior to the election. I will also post, should the Bush Bowl initiate war with Iran.
I am years behind in my e-mail, but will answer every one of you, over the next few months. I owe each and every last one of you all my thanks.
Despite the challenges and hardships of the past five years, they have been the greatest in my life.
I love all of you- and it has been an honor to stand with you in times past- as it shall be, in the future..
Make me proud- fight the power- and keep hope alive.